Momma is out for the count!

Momma is out for the count!

As moms, we sometimes feel invincible and that secretly we are superheroes who are immune to getting sick. However, every once in a while a little villain takes us down for the count!

Usually, the first thing that comes to my mind is that I can push through this. But that is not always the case. For instance, I am prone to migraines. I had one last week that took out of the game for a solid day.

I tried to press through it but my body would not let me. So, I let myself get rest. Because if I didn’t, I would be in worse shape the next day.

This works differently of everyone, but here is what I do;

  1. Have a quick meeting with the kids and share what is going on so they can understand momma is sick and needs to rest on and off throughout the day.
  2. Nap when you can. Be up when you need to be.
  3. Put off things that can wait for tomorrow or when you are better.
  4. Phone in a favor. AKA ask for help. Send an SOS.
  5. If you have to take care of a task, like feed the kiddos, make the meal simple.
  6. Schedule a Virtual Doctor’s Appointment if you think you need one and then follow the doctor’s orders.
  7. Order in food for the night
  8. Allow your spouse or partner to help

It is important you allow yourself to heal or you might become worse. You owe it to yourself. Come up with an emergency contingency plan with your spouse. This way you’re not stuck in a rut. Or partner with another mom who will help you, and you help her, when sick.

I hope you find this useful!

Love,

Jennifer

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Life Coach for Moms

Life Coach for Moms

Hi, I am Jennifer Minchin, and I am a Life Coach who specializes in working with moms who have lost themselves and want to regain their life back. I reside in Canton, Michigan; however, I can work virtually with women all over the country.

I chose to specialize in working with moms because there was a time in history I struggled with losing myself in motherhood. I remember looking in the mirror and not recognizing the woman I had become. It was not my children’s fault. It was my fault because I let myself go. I simply stopped caring for myself and in the process, I lost myself.

I am looking for moms who want to take their life from mediocre to magnificent so they can change the trajectory of their life.

I offer book studies, 1:1 appointments, mastermind groups. If you would like to take your life from mediocre to magnificent, schedule a FREE discovery call with me.

During the discovery call, we would determine if we are a match to work with each other, and which program is the best fit for you. To schedule a call, email me at jennifer@jenniferminchin.com

I look forward to hearing from you soon!

Love,

Jenn

P.S. If you want to check me out now, you can join my community of rocking moms at https://www.facebook.com/groups/375749530104602

Divorce-Proof Your Marriage

Divorce-Proof Your Marriage

Since each individual in a marriage is created differently, each marriage is unique. My hope from this blog is that you gain insight on how to keep your marriage strong and divorce- proof.

I can testify Mike and I have been through turbulent times through our marriage and at one point were headed for divorce; however, our love was much stronger.

We realized we had the tools in our toolbox to make this marriage work; however, we just needed to “divorce- proof” our marriage! I am not saying we don’t have setbacks or arguments; however, we just use the necessary means to make things work so that we communicate in a loving manner and provide mutual respect towards each other.

We found it important to make Christ the center of our marriage. He was our first priority and next our marriage was the next priority. Yep, you read that correctly! We put our marriage above everything else. We make sure each night we spend time together regardless of how tired we are even if it is just for thirty minutes.

Some nights, we might watch a movie or sit and talk. Regardless of what we do, we spend time alone without the kids. We also plan date nights for at least once a month. They are not always elaborate or fancy but we go out and do something together. Sometimes our date nights consist of grocery shopping then grabbing a bite to eat.

Next, we focus on communication. We sit down, at least once a week, and have a spouse meeting about goals, family issues, finances, and whatever else is going on. In the past, we didn’t and decisions were being made by individuals instead of us as a couple. Now, we can calm conversation instead of letting things bottle up. We try to make it fun by playing romantic music in the background and drinking a glass of wine.

Another tool we use is coming together as a team when it comes to our children! During our spouse meeting, we discuss family issues that need to be brought to our children’s attention. We then discuss those items in our family meeting. We never want our children to feel attacked so we do it in the same manner as we do it for our spousal meeting. We try to make it fun, except without the wine and romantic music.

Each partner needs to show mutual respect towards each other. When you become shallow and name call it just leads to hurt and resentment. There isn’t any trust which breaks down communication. Mike and I try to remember to talk to each other as we are talking to Jesus or as if he is in the room.

After respect, there needs to be forgiveness in a marriage. You can’t hold onto the past or old baggage. God forgives us, so we must follow the same path. There will be times you will need grace in the marriage, so always give your partner grace.

Finally, make time for intimacy. It is an important part of marriage. I know we are stressed out, tired, and sometimes not insink with our partner, but we just need to schedule it! Your marriage needs it. Sometimes you need to think outside the box to bring the spunk back into your marriage. Send your spouse romantic texts during the day or call them to say I love you. Leave them notes where they will see it. Do what you need to do so the romance stays alive.

I encourage you to try one of these tips over the next week and slowly implement the rest! You got this!

Love,

Jenn

P.S. If you enjoy my blogs check me out on Instagram @jennminchin or Facebook Jennifer Borg Minchin. Better yet, join my newsletter by going to my website htps:// http://www.jenniferminchin.com then clicking on the link for the newsletter.

Momma, give yourself grace!

Momma, give yourself grace!

I am going to be completely honest and say I have been on the exhaustion struggle bus for the past month! I can’t seem to catch a break and get my energy back.

I am running on fumes which makes me less desirable to be around. My temper is shorter, my creativity is stifled, and I am ready for bed around 8:00 p.m. which is not really feasible.

Like every momma out there, my plate is overflowing with activities and “to do” lists! I feel like a juggling artist at the circus; however, not so graceful. At any given moment, I feel like I am going to drop from exhaustion or drop the plates.

Today, I was on a strategy call with my Business Coach, Sheng. We were discussing the next big thing I am launching. I am usually excited for our zoom calls and eager to absorb everything she has to share; however, today I just felt dread with mounting tasks that seemed to be coming my way.

At the end of the call, she asked how I was really doing, and I answered honestly. I told her I was exhausted. I was going through the motions and what I really wanted to do was crawl back into bed.

She said, “Jennifer, give yourself grace.” With those four words, I felt the mounting pressure leave my body. The Life Coach needed to be reminded to give herself grace! Isn’t that ironic!

So today, I say to you…momma, give yourself grace. Take some time today to find peace and rest your weary soul.

Perhaps, read a book, go for a walk, take a hot shower, give yourself a facial, or meditate; however, whatever you choose to do release the guilt you have about doing it and remember to give yourself grace.

Also remember, you are one person doing many jobs so take time for yourself!

Love,

Jennifer

I am fired up…

I am fired up…

This past weekend, I spent three days in Iowa where my Life Coach lead five SUCCESSFUL women in a retreat!

During these three days, we created a bond with each other and formed friendships that would last a lifetime. We dug deep and shared intimate stories about our past that shaped who we are today so that we could build the framework of our future practice of our Life Coaching Business.

We are choosing to take our mess and turn it into a message so that we can help other women.

Why do I share this with you? I share this because… one I am fired up and two because it was not too long ago I would not have been willing to share my mess of a life with strangers let alone social media!

I share my stories so that if I can help one woman make a difference than I have done my job! I have made a difference in this world.

For years, I have felt I was never good enough to play big or be around other successful women. I would hold back my thoughts and hide in the corner; however, now I PLAY BIG! I go to these retreats ready to learn, lead, and receive from other women.

Are you ready to PLAY BIG?

I am starting a Virtual Community for Moms who want to play big! If you are interested in joining, email me at jennifer@jenniferminchin.com

At times, we need to cry.

At times, we need to cry.

Every human has cried. If all is well, we start crying after birth. So, it is completely natural to cry. It is a way to releases pent up emotions, and it informs others of our state of being.

Children cry in order to communicate their needs to their parents. Without this tool, they would be helpless. So, why is there a stigma around crying when adolescents and adults are involved? 

Language is useful for many things, but sometimes emotions are too complex to explain with words alone. Sometimes a person gets so overwhelmed, to the point where nothing makes senes. Everything is incomprehensible, and the only way to express oneself is through crying.

When I am overwhelmed, I cannot control my ability to cry. This usually leads me to take a break, or if I am stubborn, lets someone who cares know that I am not well. From both outcomes, I am forced to acknowledge my feelings. From there, I can find the cause of my stress and combat it.

There are many scientific studies on crying. And to summarize them all would be impossible. So to start you off, I recommend that you acknowledge that you have emotions and that your understanding of them is vital to your mental and physical health. You should remind yourself of your needs, whether they are physical or not. I also suggest you read the linked articles if you want to learn more about the subject.

-Grace

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/319631

https://www.canr.msu.edu/news/benefits-of-crying

https://www.google.com/amp/s/time.com/4254089/science-crying/%3Famp%3Dtrue

Why I became I Life Coach

Why I became I Life Coach

I was recently asked why I became a life coach, and I replied because I genuinely love helping people. Still, more specifically, I love working with and supporting women. For my entire adult life, I have been in a serving role or position, so it seemed natural that I transitioned into Life Coaching.

My undergraduate degree is in Psychology and Women’s Study, and my master’s is in Human Resources. Before working in the Direct Sales Industry, I was a Social Worker, so when I began to look into phasing into the next chapter of my life, I wanted to continue working with women while using my past experiences. So I became a Life Coach! A decision I have not regretted.

I love people and have a heartfelt desire to help them. It comes naturally to me. When someone shares a problem or a vision, I want to become their supporter. I am a good listener, and I have always had an open-door policy where friends and family can talk to me. I can show sympathy when sympathy is needed, but I can also help people make desired changes.

I truly believe in celebrating an individual’s successes. Everybody needs someone to cheer them on and to hold them accountable. When you have a vision, sometimes you lose sight of it, but when you have a Life Coach, they can help you focus on the goal. I am curious, so I ask lots of questions that gets my clients thinking and digging deep. I also like to remind people how far they have come because it motivates them to keep ongoing.

I am comfortable with silence because I know that means breakthroughs are happening. In my work, you can’t be judgemental, so I believe people should be who they are. We celebrate victories and learn from our mistakes during sessions.

The biggest and the best part of being a Life Coach is being the motivator, the inspirer, and celebrator for my client.

If you are curious about what it would be like to work with me, you can send me a message at jennifer@jenniferminchin.com, and we can schedule a FREE session to see if we are a right fit.

Or if you would like to be added to my newsletter, go to my website http://www.jenniferminchin.com and sign up for all my upcoming events and the latest news.

Love,

Jennifer

Grace’s Story

Grace’s Story

I first realized I was different at age 6. I had just experienced loss for the first time. My grandmother had died, and I wasn’t taking it well. There were days when I was so sad that school seemed impossible. I was swallowed by grief.

Then I was diagnosed with depression and made to go to therapy. I don’t remember much, but I do know it helped. I was more myself. I was able to have the ever-present weight of my grief lightened.

Things were better for a while, but other people noticed I was different. That’s when the bulling started. I was isolated from my classmates and was tormented by this one girl. No one stood up for me, no one really cared if the strange loner was crying. I had a few friends here and there, but they didn’t want the same treatment, or they didn’t care. I don’t blame them now, we were young and children are cruel.

The hardest part was when nothing changed. I tried to play it off for so long until I eventually told my parents. We brought it up with my teachers, deans, and even the principal. They gave excuses; “they’re only kids,” “are you sure you’re not exaggerating,” and “the other students haven’t said anything.” At one point, a teacher joined in. She would single me out and turn her head when anything happened. This led to more bullies. People who previously ignored me now joined in the game.

We still tried to end the problem. Every step was counted. At that point, the only solution would have been to switch schools. It was seriously considered.

I landed in the hospital in fifth grade. I was put into the outpatient program and stayed in it for about six weeks. I was there for a combination of reasons, but a large part was depression.

The program helped. My 6th-grade year was better. I was still being bullied, but this time problems were being solved. I had that teacher again, but I felt confident enough to walk out and tell someone. She hated me even more. It certainly wasn’t perfect, but it was better.

Seventh grade came and went, I didn’t have close friends, but I wasn’t being bullied either. Eighth grade came, and I made actual friends. It was a good year from that perspective. My depression was bad, though. Looking back, it was probably my therapist, medicine, and puberty. It hadn’t changed since fifth grade, but I had.

I was put into the program again, though it wasn’t as helpful. It was underfunded and understaffed. I should have been out in two weeks, but they held me longer because I hadn’t got any personalized help. Eventually, I finished it and transferred to a new therapist and practices.

Ninth grade was great. I made friends and had excellent teachers. Tenth grade was good until March. Then the wonderful pandemic came around. I was stressed and confused like everyone else, but I was able to finish out the year.

Now I will enter the eleventh grade in the fall. I don’t know what will happen, but I’m ready for it.

Guest Writer- Grace

Eight Dimensions of Wellness

Eight Dimensions of Wellness

I used to be constantly overwhelmed. To fix this, I learned, to maintain a healthy mental balance, I needed to keep the eight dimensions of wellness in check. The eight dimensions are like a well-calibrated machine; however, if one is out of alignment, it can cause havoc on your system.

Here are the eight dimensions of wellness in detail:

  1. Mental Wellness: looking after your mental health. Activities can include: affirmations, practicing gratitude, mindfulness, limiting social media.
  2. Physical Wellness: taking care of your body through exercise, nutrition, and hydration. Limiting alcohol use.
  3. Emotional Wellness: managing stress, coping mechanisms, coping with difficult emotions, and practicing mindfulness.
  4. Intellectual Wellness: participating in activities that spark mental stimulation.
  5. Spiritual Wellness: learning and practicing your core beliefs and values.
  6. Environmental Wellness: creating an environment that cultivates joy and happiness, but most of all safety.
  7. Social Wellness: creating and maintaining deep and meaningful relationships that are positive to your well being.
  8. Financial Wellness: making sure your finances are in order.

Obviously, for me, my mental and emotional wellness are the most important areas for me to maintain since I have bipolar. Every day I make sure to practice self-care by having a morning routine. It includes time alone to work out, read, journal, and meditate. I also practice gratitude and plan out my day. When you have bipolar, a routine is very important.

For financial wellness, Mike and I meet regularly to discuss our financial goals and where we are at each week. It was not always like this and this would cause stress in my life; however, we now have a system in place.

I pride myself on reading, playing games, and taking courses to further my education, so I get plenty of intellectual wellness. I am continually working on making sure I get out with my friends and not being so much of a homebody. Now that I have my medication leveled out, and my anxiety is at bay, I don’t struggle going out with friends so much. I make it a priority to go out with my husband and friends a few times a month, so I am getting social interaction.

We work as a family to make sure our home is inviting and comfortable. We divide up our chores so that everyone is contributing so it just does not fall on me anymore. Finally, I have a strong faith. I spend time in prayer each day and in God’s word.

As long as I am balanced in all eight areas, I am doing well. If one area comes of kilter, I work hard to get back on track so that I maintain a healthy well being.

I encourage you to take out your journal and assess yourself. See where you are at and if you are off in an area work on it so you can be well balanced.

xoxo

Jennifer

Eight Harmful Myths About Bipolar Disorder.

Eight Harmful Myths About Bipolar Disorder.

Do you know what musician Demi Lavato, comedian Russul Brand, and actress Catherine Zeta-Jones all have in common? According to Healthline, they, like millions of others, are all living with bipolar disorder.

Even though we are learning more and more each day about Bipolar Disorder, there still remains many misconceptions about it. I wanted to share with you some of the myths and facts, so you can be informed with knowledge and help end the stigma.

According to Healthline, here are eight harmful misconceptions:

  1. Bipolar is a rare disorder- in fact, it affects 2 million adults in the United States alone.
  2. Bipolar is just mood swings, which everyone has- in fact, the highs and lows of bipolar disorder are very different from common mood swings. Individuals with bipolar disorders experience extreme changes in energy, activity, and sleep that are not typical for them.
  3. There is only one type of bipolar disorder- in fact, there are four basic types of bipolar disorder, and the experience is different per individual. (1) Bipolar I, (2) Bipolar II, (3) Cyclothymic disorder (4) Bipolar disorder otherwise not specified
  4. Bipolar disorder can be cured with diet and exercise- in fact, it is a lifelong illness and there is no cure. It can be well managed with medication and talk therapy.
  5. Mania is productive. You are in a good mood and fun to be around- in fact, a manic person may feel good at first, but without treatment can become detrimental and even terrifying.
  6. Artists with bipolar disorder will lose their creativity if they get treatment- in fact, treatment will allow you to think more clearly, which will likely improve your work.
  7. People with bipolar disorder are always either manic or depressed- in fact, they can experience long periods of even, balanced mood called euthymia; however, they can also experience a “mixed mood”, which has features of both mania and depression at the same time.
  8. All medications for bipolar disorder are the same- in fact, it might take some trial and error to find the medication that works for you. Something that works for one person might not work for another person.

Accorinding to Healthline, 1 out 5 people are diagnosed with a mental illness, including bipolar disorder. I have responded well to my medication and therapy. My daily life is normal, and my relationships are stronger than ever. I have not had an episode since being diagnosed in over a year. I have a successful career. Since getting treatment, my marriage and our family life is stronger as well.

I share this with you so you can understand and if it can help one person than I have done my job. Feel free to share.

Love,

Jennifer